This blog is a starting point for deeper conversations about being happy with who you are, realizing your potential and knowing you can enjoy life being single, even in all the chaos we are experiencing.
When you are able to envision something different for yourself than what you have right now, it means you have bigger dreams. And what do they say about dreams? Chase your dreams! Dreams come true! Don’t give up on your dreams! If you keep dreaming it, it’s meant to be. Well, I don’t know if they say that…but I do.
If you’re dreaming something, if there’s a constant thought in your head that something needs to change, change it! You have the power. You and no one else. Sometimes we just need a little push, and sometimes we need a big one. I’m here to push you and encourage you and tell you that if I can, so can you.
I am a first generation college graduate. My parents worked so hard to ensure our family had everything we needed, well the basics anyway. The only dream I had from a very young age was that I did not want to grow up having to work so dang hard and have so little.
That’s a dream, right? A dream I made happen. Yes with my parents pushing and shoving me to get an education and get a good job. All the stuff parents are supposed to do, right?
But they didn’t push and shove me to have a “happy” life. It was always a wish for a “successful life” or a “better life than we had.” It only takes an education, getting a degree and boom! You’re done. You’ve succeeded. You have more than what your parents had. You moved out. Maybe you have your own family. Whatever it may be. BUT are you truly happy?
Sometimes we end up having all the material things we want. We think having those things will make us truly happy. At least, that’s what I thought. I thought as soon as I can move out of my parents house I’ll be happy, or when I get my degree I’ll be happy, or when I buy my house I’m going to be happy. Those things started happening for me, but guess what? I wasn’t happy.
The next thing I told myself was when I find a boyfriend, or someone who loves me, is when I’m going to be truly happy.
Well, that hasn’t happened.
I have come to realize that someone else can’t make me happy. Happiness comes from within. It starts with me! It took me a really long time to finally understand that truth. And it also took dating the wrong people and a lot of heartache and bitterness build up along the way. I was disappointed at myself because I couldn’t find someone to make me happy while everyone else around me was finding their soul mates or getting married. So, I resorted to online dating. It’s the thing for all of us single people to do these days, right? Swipe left and right and make the first move. UGH!
I got so sick of online dating. It was bad meeting after bad meeting. And don’t get me wrong, there were a few decent men on there, but not the decent men who were right for me. I have yet to meet that man. Someday I will, I’m sure of it. But for now, I am happy with ME.
Happy with what I’m doing, with spending time with myself, with being alone and not lonely. I’ve been single for many years now, and I’ve spent a lot of that time learning about myself, what I want and don’t want, and what I’m willing to accept, but most importantly, what I am NOT willing to accept. I found ways to keep myself busy and found ways to power through the struggles. I learned that happiness doesn’t start with my relationships or with anything material, but with me. Happiness is knowing life is good and right now, part of what makes me really happy are my two fur babies – Harley and Thor. What makes you happy? Leave your comments below.
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