One of the most common issues I hear from my young adult clients is the need for approval from others in order to feel good. This is inevitably caused by low self-esteem and will have a negative impact in our later years if we don’t do anything about it. Take it from me, the girl who went through all of her 20’s and beyond struggling with self-esteem issues.
It’s human nature to seek approval from our parents, friends, from a potential partner and even strangers. But when we give the opinions of others way more value than the opinion we have of ourselves, we will suffer. I know that sounds harsh but it’s a fact. You will always be basing your decisions on what other people think, or don’t think. This ends up paralyzing your ability to chase your own goals and be the person you are truly meant to be. It’s got to stop!
Let’s look at a few ways you can begin to value yourself more and place less emphasis on getting approval from others:
Let Go
If someone doesn’t like you for who you are, they aren’t meant to be in your life. Don’t fight this, it’s not worth your energy or time. When you realize your opinions and what you want to do matter, you will find peace with letting people go. It’s normal to outgrow even childhood friends who have been in your life for as long as you can remember.
When you notice you’re trying to seek someone’s approval, ask yourself this:
“Why is their approval important to me?” and “Can I provide that approval to myself?” Overcoming your need for approval will require you to first understand why you need it. If you want to unpack more of this, coaching may be a good start. Email me for more info.
Build Up Your Social Circle
We are naturally wired to connect to other humans. Whether on social media, social clubs, at school or work, make sure you have at least one person with whom you can have meaningful conversations with. I say ‘at least’ because I know how difficult it is to find people we can truly trust and with whom we can feel good about ourselves.
Avoid Focusing on What You Cannot Do
Instead, focus on what you CAN do and achieve without seeking approval or recognition from others. Make a list of everything you are able to do including your strengths and talents. Then, praise yourself every.single.day. As a result your self-esteem will grow and you will rely less on getting approval from others.
Want to learn more about building self-esteem and confidence? My brand new online course is going to teach you exactly that. Get ready to “Embrace Your Confidence” by clicking on the link.
Have questions or comments, leave them here or email me: marty@viziontrak-694537.ingress-baronn.ewp.live
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